The phone!   Image by SOMMAI via

The phone!
Image by SOMMAI via

I’m not a morning person. Not at all. My ideal time to get out of bed is sometime between 10 and noon. Or maybe a little closer to one. Either way, I don’t like 9 a.m. phone calls. Especially when I have a killer headache, and they’re phone calls that would easily fit onto a Top 10 list of early morning phone calls I don’t want to get.

This particular phone call was from my son’s speech language pathologist.

She immediately launched into an iteration of all the good things Simon had accomplished and how well he was doing.

I know that, right now, you’re probably asking yourself, ‘why is that a bad phone call?’

Because she followed that up by telling me that, since his current teacher is so awesome, she believes he can go from receiving speech services 10 x in 9 weeks to 5 x in 9 weeks. She says that she actually thinks he can go down to receiving no services – just let her consult with the teacher – but she thinks that lowering it instead of removing it will ‘help him transition.’

But wait, I say, finally interrupting her because she hasn’t let me get a word in edgewise. He’s only going to be with his teacher for another two months. We need to consider the future. What he’ll be doing for a year.

Oh, but she knows that her teacher next year will also be excellent because she works with her already, so it’ll be fine.

I tell her, wait, I need to think. We can discuss this at our ARD on Monday morning.

Ah, she says, I may or may not be able to make it on Monday.

Excuse me? I say.

Do you have time to talk now, she says.

No, I tell her, I don’t. (Which is true – I had a 10 a.m. appointment that I needed to get ready for.)

So don’t worry, I say. If you can’t make it, we can reschedule the ARD. It might cause problems or be difficult, but we will definitely want you there.

No, she says, it’s okay. I’ll be available by phone for you if you have any questions.

No, I say. It’s okay. We can reschedule it.

You know, she says, let me check my schedule.

I wait, and she comes back on the line.

I do have an evaluation scheduled for that morning, she says, but I can reschedule it.

Sooooo, I realize, she probably wouldn’t have been available to talk to by phone if she was doing an eval. But, I still gave in a little, and I made sure to mention that we could try to do the speech portion first so she wouldn’t have to stay for the whole meeting.

But a part of me was seething.

She knew she couldn’t make the ARD, but she didn’t call to tell me that.

No, she called to try to get me to agree to everything so she could more easily skip the ARD.

Not. Gonna. Happen.

Not even at 9 a.m. when I’m barely awake.

Not even when I have such a migraine that I can barely read my phone’s screen.

Not even.

[I admit now that I wasn’t taking notes during the phone call, so the ‘she says’ and ‘I say’ are totally summaries of what was actually said…some of the wording may be slightly off, but I stand by the content of the phone call.]