And other thoughts on someone else’s blog…
Abandoning Pretense wrote an awesome blog about what happens when her son got put on ADHD meds and how much the drugs helped him function.
Her statement is that she likes him better when he’s on the drugs, and she likes herself better when he’s on them because she’s in a better mood and able to deal with things better.
I get that.
But I wouldn’t say I “like” Simon better when he’s drugged.
I would say, though, that he’s happier when he’s drugged, and that makes me happier.
Like the blogger there, we also tried to avoid giving Simon drugs when he was younger. We fought it for years. He didn’t need them, we told ourselves. He’d be okay without them. Drugs are unnecessary. Drugs are a crutch.
But they aren’t.
They’re necessary. Sometimes.
I’m not saying that medication is the answer. But it is an answer, and in some cases, it’s the best answer. It’s like when you can pick “E” for all of the above.
We gave Simon everything we could, and it wasn’t enough. He still had melt-downs that he couldn’t control. He had anxiety that he couldn’t control. He got violent.
We started him on medication.
And things got better.
He was more relaxed. He seemed to feel better. He seemed to be able to enjoy himself more.
And, yeah, that made things better for us, but mostly for him. It’s not fair to withhold the medication from him, saying that he doesn’t “need” it.
We tried to stop it at one point, to pull it back, to reduce the amount of medication he took.
The difference was immediate. He went from having fun to needing constant redirection and constant reassurance. Anything that went off schedule was melt-down city.
We brought the levels back up, and he became himself again.
Yup, that’s what I said – he became himself. Because without the drugs, he couldn’t be himself. He had to be what his brain told him to be. His brain messed with him, made him anxious, made him upset. The drugs allowed him to get back to where he had been before. Where he could feel good, where he could feel “normal.”
So, no, I don’t like him better on drugs.
But I’m glad he’s on them.